This morning I let myself thought about something we all have thought of at least once: The Future. And unlike my usual emotionally-blank thoughts, I was thinking about the Future with fear.
Yes, I am scared of the future. Not that phobia-like fear, but more to the feeling of loosing the comfort in its uncertainty. Future is also something that we can not avoid. It's there, it's waiting for us with whatever it's going to give. No other options. No matter how hard we try to divert it, it keeps going and dragging us with it. And as what it does to everyone, it also drags me with it to an uncertainties where I should prepare myself to fight or to love whatever we might pass.
Then my brain, in the middle of this silent conversation as it always do, randomly accessed my language section files and found a related topic to it: Future tense.
In English grammar, Future tense is a form of a tense that is bound by the sense of time, in which it tells us about what happens in the specific time. In this case, the Future. In future tense, instead of simply putting Noun and Verb together, we need to put a set of words that we call Modals, which is a set of words such as Will, May, Must, Can, Have/Has/Had to, and so forth in between them.
Those words have different functions: Will asks about something that is going to happen, May asks about something that is allowed to happen, Can is related to how you have the ability to do or not to do something, Must tells you about your responsibility, while Have, Has, or Had to tells you that you have no other options besides doing and living on what is going to be there.
But if the future is uncertain, then why invent Will? If it's inevitable, then why we have Can? If there is no option, why do we include May? Who told you and give your responsibility with Must? I mean, at least why are we including them in Future tense?
Is it a subtle way to say that The Future, albeit unavoidable, can be altered? But how to alter something that haven't been there? What if avoiding yourself get stabbed by a knife means that you will not be able to visit a hospital, meeting your destined soul mate there, and finally having yourself married to someone you've been longing to? What if deciding not to go out driving in the middle of a storm to avoid car accident means you will have an earthquake that will smash you and eventually kill you?
Maybe... Maybe it's because you just have to do what you have to do. What you think you have to do. That is what is called as "altering the future". We don't actually altering it, we are trying to make it profitable to us, mentally, physically, financially, whatever it is. It is our nature to act preventive towards foreseen disasters. The disaster, the outcome.. They are all uncertain, yet at least we tried.
Still, The Future frightens me a bit.
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